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Our Manual Critic Crow T. Robot Reads: Usually these party dudes would inhale the mozzarella platter as if it were the last "za" on earth, but not tonight. |
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Michaelangelo Says: Instead I'll just take a couple piece with me. For energy! |
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Crow T. Robot Reads: You see, only hours ago, their trusted friend, April, was kidnapped from her mobile news van by the vile, ruthless, terrorist bully SHREDDER! He's a Slice-O-Matic crum, a villain more vicious than an army of mind altered Bruce Lees. |
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Bruce Lee Says: I'm not in this world to live up to your expectations and you're not in this world to live up to mine. |
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Crow T. Robot Reads: The dreaded Bo (not to be confused with everyone's favorite "10") is Donatello's form of amusement. |
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Tom Servo Says: Everyone raise their hands that understood that reference when they were a kid. |
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Crow T. Robot Reads: So take control of these heroes in a half shell, and either claim total victory over New York's premier Kick Man... or lead them onto the menu at McTurtles (Home of the Quarter Flounder with Cheese). |
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April O'Neil Says: I can't eat turtles! Turtles are supposed to eat... |
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The Bent Kangaroo Says: Stop! We only promote gratuitous violence here. |
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Crow T. Robot Reads: In search of turtle fodder, Foot Clan platoons tour New York's famous avenues in these Roller Cars (once used by David Letterman during his now famous "smashing" episodes). |
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David Letterman Says: Which brings us to our Top 10 Reasons to play Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles |
10)When you take a course in art history, you'll feel smarter than your classmates.
9)You can play with nunchuks without having to worry about hitting yourself in the crotch.
8)You get to ride around in a van called the party wagon and run over pedestrians.
7)It is the one time you can play with the Foot Clan without your wife subsequently restricting your internet access.
6)You can jump really high and have no idea where you're going to land. Like Kim Zmeskal.
5)It is just like the cartoon, except in the cartoon the turtles don't die every forty seconds.
4)You get to rescue a beautiful damsel tied to a chair, a favorite pasttime.
3)You can learns the joys of sewer system living in New York without being homeless.
2)You can call your boss a rat and get away with it.
1)Like college, the only nutrition is pizza.
Links
Flying Omelette's Review
GameFAQs
Moby Games
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