Watchers
(Travis Cornell finds super smart dog in the mountains)
Travis Cornell
You're super smart. I'll name you Einstein.
(Einstein finds Travis a mate while walking in the park)
Nora Devon
I'm not sure I like you, but I love your super smart dog. Let's teach him how to read.
Travis Cornell
Wow, you did it! Will you marry me?
Nora Devon
Yes!
(Super smart and violent ape-like beast finds Einstein and tries to kill family)
Travis Cornell
Let's move out of Orange County.
(Super smart yet psychotic assassin finds out about everyone, including the research at the recombinant DNA lab that went haywire, and wants the dog)
Assassin
Sssssnnnaaap!
Nora Devon
Let's teach Einstein how to use Scrabble tiles!
(Einstein fills them in on all the shit going down, while simultaneously using witty and insightful comments that make everyone laugh and cry)
A few months later...
Assassin
I found you!
(Travis kills him)
A few hours later...
Beast
Mickey Mouse!
(Travis kills him)
A few days later...
The Feds
We found you! Give us our property.
Travis Cornell
They're dead, assholes.
(The Feds leave)
Einstein
Thank you for that. Now I'm going to mate and hopefully provide lots of intelligent offspring so that all the readers who just fell in love with me can have one for their very own.
